⚡ THE PARALLEL PORT DINER ⚡
EST. 1994 - WHERE LEGACY PERIPHERALS MEET FLAVOR
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▓ 25-PIN SPECIAL ▓
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🍔 THE PARALLEL PORT COMBO PLATTER 🍔
THE SCANNER SUPREME
★★★
HP, EPSON & VISIONEER STYLE! POPULAR FLATBED GOODNESS BEFORE USB TOOK OVER THE KITCHEN
ZIP & JAZZ DRIVE DELUXE
★★★★
IOMEGA'S FINEST REMOVABLE STORAGE! 100MB-2GB OF CHUNKY BACKUP GOODNESS
THE EXTERNAL CD TOWER
★★★
CD-ROM & CD-R DRIVES FOR LAPTOPS! STACKED HIGH WITH 650MB OF OPTICAL FLAVOR
HARD DRIVE BURGER
★★★★
EXTERNAL STORAGE PATTY! SERVED WITH IOMEGA SECRET SAUCE
TAPE BACKUP WRAP
★★★
SMALL BUSINESS SPECIAL! WRAPPED IN RELIABLE QIC CARTRIDGE GOODNESS
NETWORK ADAPTER NUGGETS
★★
LESS COMMON BUT TASTY! ETHERNET CONNECTIVITY IN BITE-SIZE PIECES
SCSI ADAPTER SIDES
★★
DAISY-CHAIN YOUR PERIPHERALS! SERVED WITH TERMINATION RESISTOR GARNISH
DIGITAL CAMERA CHIPS
★★
EARLY DIGICAM TRANSFER CRUNCH! 640x480 PIXELS OF PURE NOSTALGIA
🎮 MANAGER'S SPECIAL: THE MODEM MIX-UP 🎮
OOPS! YOU WERE THINKING OF SERIAL PORT MODEMS (9-PIN) NOT PARALLEL!
★ HARDWARE MODEMS: SERIAL/ISA - THE GOOD STUFF
★ WINMODEMS: PCI - THE TERRIBLE STUFF NOBODY ORDERED
★ NO REFUNDS ON CONFUSION ★
💎 THE SCSI PREMIUM MENU 💎
THE PRO UPGRADE
★★★★★★
SAME ITEMS, PROFESSIONAL GRADE!
★ HIGHER COST - PREMIUM INGREDIENTS
★ BETTER PERFORMANCE - FASTER COOKING
★ MULTI-DEVICE CHAINING - SHARE WITH 7 FRIENDS
★ REQUIRES CONTROLLER CARD - BYO KITCHEN
★ TERMINATION & ID SETTINGS - SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED
SCSI: FOR WHEN YOU WANT THE SAME MEAL BUT FANCY
🏆 TODAY'S SPECIAL INSIGHT 🏆
PARALLEL PORT = CONSUMER SWEET SPOT
★ CHEAPER THAN SCSI
★ BETTER THAN NOTHING
★ NO CASE OPENING REQUIRED
★ THE BRIDGE TECH UNTIL USB ARRIVED
"EXTERNAL, AFFORDABLE, ACCESSIBLE"
- CHEF'S PHILOSOPHY, 1995